My First Love

You have foresaken your first love.

That's what I'm hearing lately. That was the message given to the church of Ephesus in the book of Revelation. I can relate. However the story of Hosea and Gomer may be a more accurate description of my relationship with God. Ya, I'd say I'm definitely more of a Gomer than a Church in Ephesus. The message is still the same. You have foresaken your first love.

I just wrote and then erased a couple paragraphs. I don't need to get into all the details but I do want to share that I am working at returning to my first love. It's not as easy as it sounds. I absolutely must be more intentional with my time, and I must intentionally make time for God. I have been doing a lot of good things lately, even "God" things lately, but there is a difference between that and personal time with God. And I have been doing Gomer things lately too which make me want to roll my eyes and bang my head on the wall. Stupid Gomer. Thank you Lord for forgiving and accepting me still.

I am so glad I feel empty and hungry and this longing. If I didn't feel empty I wouldn't want to be full. If I wasn't hungry I wouldn't want to be satisfied. If I wasn't longing I wouldn't be seeking.

I'm so glad God accepts me as I am and loves me enough not to leave me that way. I still feel somewhat broken, but I also feel like God is beginning to put me back together again.

My prayer is that, Lord, You will continue this work started in me. My life is Yours. Help me make the most of it. Lord, you know the desires of my heart. I ask that Your desires become mine. Please rearrange my priorities. Help me be the person You have created me to be. Please help me make You my first and foremost love.

Amen.