Friday, June 29, 2012

Hurt

A relationship has ended.
I will never regret our time together.

It feels horrible ending something so amazing, not because things weren't working out, but because they were working so well that the possibility of us being together for the rest of our lives was very very real.

I am scared I will never find another person like her. There are very few people in my life I have ever felt comfortable enough with to allow to get so close. I know I say that in the midst of heartache but it is true. I have never found someone who makes me laugh and understands my sense of humour like she did. I have never felt the urge to sit under the stars and hold someone like I did with her. I have never related so easily and freely as I have with her. I have never cared for someone the way I cared for her.

She made me want to be a better person, for myself and for her. Her influence in my life has lead me to seek God more, to pursue deeper family relationships, to live a healthier lifestyle.

I wrote her a poem a few days ago. I was going to give it to her tonight. It's one of my trademark "awesome and quirky" lyrical endeavours. The final line says, "You are my sunset, because my day fades with you not in it."

:'(

The truth of that line is hitting me pretty hard at the moment.

1 comment:

Matthew said...

Sorry to hear such news, and I certainly understand your hurt.

How we interpret these experiences makes such a huge impact on what we do with them and what choices we make in the future.

If you can muster up the strength to not draw any conclusions yet and simply observe and pay attention to what your experiencing, I really believe it can make a significant difference.

And I hope you keep finding positive ways to express what's going on inside, even if it's not with words.